One of the common themes with my clients that I see is their consistent questioning and doubting of themselves when it comes to making decisions. Decisions with raising kids, decisions with career choices, decisions with relationships, and especially ending relationships. “Will I make the right decision? Will it all work out? Will it happen… Read More »
Your “soul mate” isn’t “perfect” for a reason
Relationships are challenging at times, especially as we grow as adults. Relationships go through phases and stages. Ideally, we would like to choose a partner that moves through the growth of the relationship with us. We start from the “honeymoon” period where each partner presents him and herself as the ideal mate. We’re kind of… Read More »
“Thinking positive” may not always work
Dealing with emotions is probably the most difficult balancing act that we experience in our lives. When we spend too much time and effort avoiding emotions, we are in denial. When we spend too much time trying to fight them, we are angry and resentful. When we exert too much energy taking advantage of the power and leverage… Read More »
It’s not you, it’s me
I found this very accurate. Going inward is hard work but the payoff is well worth it. I guess when you meet your “soulmate” that’s pretty much their job. Making you face yourself for your own growth. From Ram Dass: “What you have found from your past relationships is that what you are attracted to in a person isn’t… Read More »
7 ways to become a better parent
1. Don’t take yourself so seriously. There are no perfect parents. However, you are the perfect parent for your child. Don’t focus on the ways you “aren’t”. Comparing yourself to other parents is only getting you out of the “now” and what is going on in front of you. Your kids need you here. Now. They don’t need you to focus on what… Read More »
Change is always an inside job
(This, like many topics that I deal with concerning my clients, also hits home for me. Remembering who is responsible for change seems like a common sense concept. However, it never hurts to be reminded of the simple things. I know I appreciate it when I am reminded.) Much of my time interacting with my… Read More »
Moving from judgement to compassion
How do we begin to understand others, when it can be difficult to understand ourselves? Why is it that we insist that we have the answers for those around us when we too struggle to change? People can seem to annoy us, piss us off, and cause us pain. We say “if they would just… Read More »
The need to be “right”
What is it that drives us to seek truths or cling to culturally accepted beliefs? When faced by others who have different beliefs, why do we at times feel so threatened? We seek others who tend to hold our viewpoints and when around those who we differ with we may refrain from intently listening to their… Read More »
The paradox of noise
I found the following sitting on the copy machine where I work the other day. I thought I’d share it. Paradox of Noise It is a paradox that we encounter so much internal noise when we first try and sit in silence. It is a paradox that experiencing pain releases pain. It is a… Read More »
Personal empowerment
We’ve all done it at some point. We go against our better intuition in making a decision whether it’s casual or of serious importance. We look back with regret on what we “should have” or “shouldn’t have” done. We’ll say things to ourselves such as “I had a feeling” or “I knew this would happen”. Is… Read More »